Goodbye 2011
I am not trying to revive the past, but sometimes it is difficult to envision the future without understanding or having some shallow grasp of what you have lived in the past. Lately, i’ve been having crazy dreams where my nightmares come true in which i have to make a decision that i’ve been putting off for years. Maybe what i am trying to avoid is completely unavoidable. If that is the case, who will have the answers for me?
Some people say that when something ends, a new beginning shows itself. I feel like i have seen many new beginnings but have only invested in a couple. I don’t know why i keep dwelling in the past. Maybe it is because i am unsure of my future? Regardless, i know i have the power to move on. I feel voiceless and worrisome about the feelings that have been occupying my brain space.
So unforgettable, yet so destructive. It’s amazing how much you change within a span of a year or two. E-mails and words and emotions and feelings - nothing ever stays the same. Maybe your convictions, but nothing else. Or maybe it’s all an illusion anyway and we are all living a very lucid but deceptive dream.
